by Marty Brenner
All humans feel anger but each of us expresses our emotions in a variety of ways. You can hide your anger from others, or you may explode with rage. You may even allow anger to infiltrate into your daily existence and become a chronically cranky person. Behavioral scientists categorize anger into various styles, including hidden, explosive and chronic styles. You can exhibit one or more styles of anger at any given time.
Hidden anger styles are those that you try to suppress or disguise your feelings. You may even be completely or mostly unaware that you are harboring anger. There are three types of hidden anger styles, including anger avoidance, passive aggressive tendencies and paranoia.
You may feel anger is inappropriate or unhealthy and display the hidden anger style known as anger avoidance. Passive-aggressive tendencies are also categorized as a hidden style, as internal resentment builds as a reaction to an oppressive force, like an abusive husband or overbearing boss. Paranoia is based on distrust, where you project your anger and negativity onto others and then react defensively against anything they may say or do.
A person with an explosive style of anger periodically expresses his emotions in abrupt, dramatic outbursts. Sudden anger comes in short bursts and dissipates rapidly. Shame-based anger describes a tendency to quickly convert your feelings of inadequacy or oppression into anger directed at the person you think is trying to shame or humiliate you. Excitatory anger is another explosive style of anger- you feel a sense of excitement during arguments and fights. The final style of explosive anger is deliberate anger, exhibited by people who have learned that anger is an effective tool to manipulate others. These people might yell loudly, stamp their feet, and appear to be quite irate when they actually feel calm inside.
We tend to think of anger as occurring as isolated, dramatic episodes but this emotion can take on a chronic style. Chronic anger makes you habitually cranky, bitter and mean-spirited. Anger is habit-forming when it becomes the most easily available and effective emotion in your arsenal of self-defense. You learn that anger works, so you develop an angry one-size-fits-all attitude that becomes your prevalent demeanor. You may have a chronic form of moral anger in which you are in a constant state of outrage at people whom you feel don’t live up to your moral standards. For example, you may feel so strongly against abortion that you give up your home and travel the country to attend protests. You may even wear your moral outrage like a cloak, incorporating your anger into your very identity.
Resentment and hate are chronic styles of anger, and are possibly the most difficult to overcome. You may let anger from small transgressions build up inside you, snowballing into larger and more complex emotions of hate and resentment, instead of dealing with each issue as it occurs. A resentful person will collect hurtful events deep inside, taking careful notes whenever someone harms them. No sins are ever forgiven and the person who offends the chronically angry person is treated with loathing and hatred.
Marty has been providing guidance and counseling for the last 20 years to a wide and diverse range of people.
Individuals challenged with various addictions including but not limited to – substance abuse, alcohol, and anger.
Marty is a certified chemical dependency counselor and anger management facilitator.
Affectionately known as “Marty”, he has positively influenced and helped reshape the lives of many people in recovery, ranging from ex-cons to his high profile clients in the Delray Beach, Florida.
Marty is an excellent resource with in-depth knowledge of all of the current trends in the substance abuse and mental health treatment fields, as well as individual options for successful recovery outcomes.
Today, residential facilities simply aren’t an option for many clients with busy work schedules and travel conflicts, which is why Marty tailors programs to meet the needs of these clients, whether it be in his office or a location of their choosing.
His approach is casual and non-threatening. Marty is very kind and caring.
As you know, it is difficult to convince clients that anger management or substance abuse treatment is critical. Career commitments, privacy, reputation and other concerns may conflict in making treatment the priority it should be.
It is Marty’s primary goal to help people rebuild lives using tried and true techniques.
- Anger and Relationships General Overview and Differences
- Anger Complications
- Anger in the Workplace
- Anger Styles