by Marty Brenner
Humans possess a wide variety of emotions, some positive and others negative. Love, affection, safety and respect are positive emotions that make you feel good inside. Negative emotions, such as loneliness, fear and anger feel unpleasant. We are sometimes taught as very young children to express only positive emotions and suppress negative ones rather than dealing with the issues that triggered these responses. Despite cultural taboos against expressing negative emotions, anger does play a positive role in your life – there is such a thing as “good anger.”
Anger is the emotion you feel towards something that is offensive, dangerous or annoying. You need this emotion to protect yourself against a cruel and dangerous world and to set boundaries with others. An angry outburst is a clear signal that someone has offended you and a sign that you are willing to fight back. People are less likely to continue a behavior if they know the activity will elicit an angry response.
Anger is the powerful emotion that allows you to stand up for yourself or something you are passionate about. When you get angry about something, you send a clear signal to observers that you have deep feelings about the matter and are willing to fight for it. Well-expressed anger commands respect and cooperation from others. You can use good anger to move from a bad or unpleasant situation into a more positive one.
Humans have a natural need to feel safe and secure. Our natural inclination is to always move away from fearful situations and towards our own comfort zone where we feel positive emotions. When your safety is threatened, anger is one of the two emotions that your body uses to defend itself. Fear is the other emotion. This is the classic fight-or-flight reaction – anger helps us fight our way out of danger while fear tells us to run away. If humans did not possess the emotion of anger, we would only feel fear when we are in danger.
Good anger provides the emotional power behind the fight-or-flight instinct. Anger is the emotion of a fighter whereas fear is associated with a victim. Anger gives you the emotional, and sometimes physical, power to overcome the threat and return to a place where you feel comfortable and secure. Anger is a natural reaction to threats, actual or perceived, empowering you to deal with dangerous and overwhelming obstacles that you would not normally be able to overcome.
Healthy anger is a momentary reaction to a negative situation. Once the unpleasant circumstance has been resolved, healthy anger dissipates and you feel happy again. For example, your new puppy nips at your face. You shout at the puppy to defend yourself and display your displeasure. The dog now knows she should not bite and you immediately regain affection for the puppy.
Good anger is a natural and useful emotion that protects and empowers you in dangerous situations. You can use healthy anger to improve your surroundings and mark your personal boundaries. Good anger quickly and effectively changes a bad circumstance into a positive experience.
Marty has been providing guidance and counseling for the last 20 years to a wide and diverse range of people.
Individuals challenged with various addictions including but not limited to – substance abuse, alcohol, and anger.
Marty is a certified chemical dependency counselor and anger management facilitator.
Affectionately known as “Marty”, he has positively influenced and helped reshape the lives of many people in recovery, ranging from ex-cons to his high profile clients in the Delray Beach, Florida.
Marty is an excellent resource with in-depth knowledge of all of the current trends in the substance abuse and mental health treatment fields, as well as individual options for successful recovery outcomes.
Today, residential facilities simply aren’t an option for many clients with busy work schedules and travel conflicts, which is why Marty tailors programs to meet the needs of these clients, whether it be in his office or a location of their choosing.
His approach is casual and non-threatening. Marty is very kind and caring.
As you know, it is difficult to convince clients that anger management or substance abuse treatment is critical. Career commitments, privacy, reputation and other concerns may conflict in making treatment the priority it should be.
It is Marty’s primary goal to help people rebuild lives using tried and true techniques.
- Anger and Relationships General Overview and Differences
- Anger Complications
- Anger in the Workplace
- Anger Styles